I've been remiss. But a friend and cancer survivor urged me to keep track of all of our blessings (I guess I need a notebook...two maybe...one for medical bills and one for blessings. I can only hope the blessing one gets filled up faster than the medical bill one.) In any case, I need to catch up.

Before we heard the news there were two things that happened that week I wanted to remember:

One, my good friend Donnette invited me in for hot chocolate and a chat one evening. We had a good visit and discussed many things, but what stuck with me was something she'd said about her gospel doctrine lesson the previous Sunday (which I'd missed). She talked about prayer and asking for the desires of one's heart. She mentioned the difference between sort of reluctantly resigning oneself to the will of God (waiting for the other shoe to drop) and asking for the desires of your heart. She said it's OK to ask for the desires of your heart. That thought kept running through my head amidst the bleak dark thoughts that came after learning of Shane's diagnosis.

Two, my good friend Lynda and I were meeting with other friends (sort of an extended visiting teaching visit where the sister we teach were there as well as some of the sister they teach and we got it all done in a very fun way) for lunch. Lynda was the first one there and as I approached her she mentioned the burst of happiness, positivity and love she felt emanate from me as I came in and sat down by her. I appreciated so much her words and felt so encouraged by them. In moments since I've thought about how no matter what happens I want to hang on to that--I want to be that person and put out that kind of positive energy even when times are difficult and painful. I'm not sure exactly how to go about it, but I hope being mindful of it will assist me.




I wrote about this more on my other blog, but we do feel blessed by the encouragement, empowerment and advice of family and friends and physicians who are helping us seek the best care for Shane. That sort of puts this week's plans up in the air a bit, but we feel we are on the right track and doing the right thing a little bit later is better than doing the wrong thing or doing the right thing only halfway. While I seek and pray for all the information we need, I also find myself fearing what's more...what's next. Right now I'm praying for courage to be able to accept the next step--whatever it may be.




Lovely notes, comments, e-mails, hugs, prayers, well wishes. They all mean the world to us. We do feel carried by the love, faith and hope of those around us.




And finally, it's such a blessing to have good friends in the right places, even in temporal ways. Maybe in times like this when resources and energy feel used up beyond what I sometimes feel I can deal with, especially in temporal ways. I'm not feeling my best this evening and the thought of making plans for a post-fast Sunday dinner tomorrow (and the next night when we will be in SLC @ Huntsman till the dinner hour) overwhelmed me. As I found myself fighting to stay awake well before 9 p.m. we heard a car pull up and a knock on the door. Our friends who are both friends and employees of our caterer friends showed up with two huge trays of leftovers. (I don't know if I mentioned this before, but I am a huge fan of hand-me-downs and of catering leftovers.) Enough for Sunday and Monday dinner.

I hate (well, only partly) to steal this from our dear TAMN, but we are seriously so blessed.